VOWS

JIM:                in a moment, imber and joe will exchange their vows. after the vows there will be music, and then silence. within this silence anyone is welcome to give voice to prayer or messages to the couple. imber and joe will end the period of silence and sharing by standing and exchanging rings.

KRISTIE:       For their vows, imber and joe are first going to share with us a series of commitments they have already made with each other throughout their relationship

JOE:               When I first met imber at houseness, there was definitely a connection, but I had just moved to the bay area and wasn't really ready to jump into a relationship.  The cool thing was that imber seemed to understand all of this perfectly without either of us even saying a word!
The silent commitment we made that day was basically "not right now, please check back later".

IMBER:         A couple years later, i was living in a house with j.d. and mark welch. Eventually joe moved into a room on the floor below my room. i enjoyed living with joe, even though we were not yet romantically involved.  after a year, our landlord decided to raise the rent and we knew it was time to find another place to live. on the night of september 28, 2003, while we were discussing this situation, Joe was standing in the doorway to my room and I looked up from my desk and said, "Well, There is one thing that I am absolutely certain of: As long as I am living in the bay area, I know that I want to live with you". In my mind, this was just a normal roommate to roommate statement.
At this point in time, Joe lost all color in his face and almost turned a little gray. He then ran away very quickly without saying anything. I thought for sure that he had just been ravaged by the onslaught of some flu or something.

JOE:               Even though it was just a statement from one roommate to another, it was also very intense to me, and I had to take a few moments to myself to fully process it.

IMBER:         2 nights later; on what was reportedly October 1st, 2003, the night started out like almost any other night. Mark was up in his room chatting on his computer; J.D. had been flown up to Seattle to help rid the world of spammers;  and I was sitting on our livingroom couch watching some junky tv shows while paying my bills online. Joe, who never ever ever watched tv, sat down next to me and he sat there for hours while i just watched lame tv and payed my bills. It was about 2am when I was done and I closed my laptop and stood up and I was ready to turn off the tv and leave the living room. I turned to Joe and asked him if he wanted me to leave the tv on? (I still couldn't understand why he was even still here?) He seemed flabbergasted, so I turned off the tv and returned to the couch and sat down. Joe stood up and moved an ottoman over across from where I was sitting on the couch. He sat down on the ottoman and he began to speak.

JOE:               I had been hanging out with imber that night because I was definitely feeling the connection with her that I had felt when we first met.  Things were in flux in our lives, and I was thinking now was the time to give it a chance.  I don't remember exactly what I said, but it was time to give things a try and that's what I told imber.

IMBER:         I was floored, but I think my reply was something like, "sure, let's give it a try"

JOE:               To cut yoda short, “There is no try, only do”.  Some time passed until imber and I stopped to reflect on how long it had been.  We actually didn't know and had to ask our housemate who informed us that the date in question was October 1st, 2003.  While imber thinks it was only 2 weeks and I think it was more like 2 months, whenever I became aware that October 1^st is our anniversary, I asked said "Hey imber, if we are still together in 2010, can we get married on October 1st, 2010?"

IMBER:         I said, "Yes"

                      

IMBER:         So, of course, 2 months into our relationship in December of 2003, joe and i bought a house that we then shared with friends. We were handed the keys to our new house. We agreed to take care of our house to the best of our ability.

JOE:               We also promised that we would stay together for at least as long as we owned the house.

IMBER:         As we processed the whirlwind nature of being first time home owners, we had a couple rough days and nights. From this came one of my most solemn vows to Joe.
I promise to you that whenever I am struggling, whenever I am scared, I will not hide that from you, I will always let you know how I am feeling.

JOE:               In November of 2005, we decided that it was time to sell our house and try to start our family. We made a vow: "With the birth of our first child, we will definitely be together for at least 20 years."

IMBER:         With your whole-hearted support, I chose to be a full-time mom to our child.

                      

JOE:               so that brings all of you up to date with the promises that we've made in private.

                      Now, before you all and the open sky, we make new promises, the promises that create our marriage.

                      first, I will always be as true with you as I am with myself.

                      second, I vow to support you, michael and our family in all ways for all endeavors that we may undertake in this life.

                      third, I promise I will always make time for myself as well, so that I can have the balance to  follow through on my vows to you

                      and lastly, I will pledge to not forget that love is a verb.

IMBER:         to you, my love, I commit myself to us through years of growth and sharing

                      I vow to join with you and to share all that is to come, to be your partner, to give and to receive, to speak and to listen, to inspire and to respond

                      I give myself as I am and as I will be, and I do it all to infinity and beyond!

                      "I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way."

                      - Pablo Neruda